Irrational adj.
Without or deprived of normal mental clarity or sound judgment.
Optimism - n.
A disposition or tendency to look on the more favourable side of events or conditions and to expect the most favourable outcome.

Sunday, 12 June 2011

Attitude and Power Sneakers.


Seriously, Claire got me the GamesMaster Sonic 20th Anniversary Special issue, which includes a page about songs featuring Sonic. Mentioned Wonderman and I realised I didn't actually have the song.
Promptly sorted that out and been listening to it a lot all day.

So, operation is all done. Face aches like a bitch but I'm still pretty sure it hurt more last time. Which is very odd considering I had more done this time. Polyps removed, but also deviated septum straightened and a sinus wash out.
Special mention goes to Jenni for keeping me occupied in hospital with her Tot-Attack. A full-on offensive including facebook messages, texts, emails, tweets... possibly some stuff I haven't even found yet  Gave me lots of stuff to trawl through when I woke up after the op <3.
Ended up staying in an extra night (Friday) as my BP was high, heartrate was high and my sats were low.
Coughing up the blood that'd fallen into my lungs during the op has also been fun. I was warned that general anaesthetic collapses the bottoms of your lungs so I might get an infection afterwards if I can't get up what's stuck down there. Pretty sure that's starting to flare up now. Started my usual antibiotics already, hope it doesn't get any worse.
Worried I might have some nerve damage... my gum behind my top right canine has been numb since the op. There's a little patch on the roof of my mouth, back right, that's the same. Guess I'll just have to see if the feeling comes back soon.
Oh, sore throat too. Fail.

Had a barbecue in the rain tonight. I stayed inside, away from the cold and the smoke. Had some burgers and sausages. And brownies. Nom.
Had Lee and Hannah round to talk shite, watch trailers and scour YouTube with.

Running out of time for getting STCO freebies sorted for Summer of Sonic.
Hopefully will be able to order some tomorrow that'll arrive in time to take to London on the 23rd.
I really hope so. I wanted to get some more awareness out this year.  Not just for readers but for contributors too. Recruitment drive is in full swing. I HAVE BIG PLANS FOR THIS COMIC, DAMNIT.
Things are almost together for our 20th Anniversary Special to be released on the 23rd. Should be a nice release.
MIGHT even keep people happy.

So, not really been up to much today, fell asleep again when I got up this morning. Face was hurting so I just fell asleep again, curled up on the couch (Shouldn't take a nap, might get spin attacked).
Texted mah Tot (lots, duh), watched some Bones, fiddled around with some STCO stuff. Not drawn any today, which I really should've. On a deadline now, under two weeks to finish a strip. I'll be fine. I've done a whole five-page strip in its entirety in three days before. Hardcore.

Off to bed soon, should get some sleep and get to work drawing tomorrow while I have the natural light, my eyes are really getting worse lately.
Not just drawing, focusing on my computer screen and phone screen is getting difficult. Eyes start falling out of focus quite quickly. Need to get an eye test. Soon. Becoming quite a problem.


Tuesday, 7 June 2011

This took me two days to write.

Full of sausage, mash, yorkie, peas and gravy. And chocolate cake and custard. And diet pepsi. And coffee. And a tic-tac.

Well, I'll be off into hospital tomorrow for my nasal polypectomy. Second one of my adult life, fourth overall.
ENT guy seems to think that they keep growing back because of the shape of my nose, so they're cutting away some cartilage to see if that helps. Anything that makes for a bit more room up there is fine by me, my nose always feels blocked.

Decided to stop collecting £2 and 50p coins. I had fourteen different £2 designs and fourteen different 50p's.
Bought a new checky blue shirt with seven of my newly spendable thirty-five pounds. And a Fry's Turkish Delight to take into hospital with me.

It is now Wednesday and I'm in hospital. Sat in the day room as they apparently weren't expecting me. Jesus, daytime tele is still shit. People wonder why I don't watch tele anymore...
They're currently waiting for a guy to leave a side room then they're 'giving it a spruce up' and then I'll be in there. Side room ftw, I was really not looking forward to sleeping in a shared area again. Just impossible to sleep.
Well, tonight would've been anyway. Tomorrow I doubt I'd care as I will be totally smacked off my tits =).

Bit annoyed that I'm not going to be able to exercise much for the next couple of weeks... No strenuous activity allowed, I'm afraid. Should probably lay off the late nights, too. But we'll see how that works out, eh.

Clairey is, of course, all worried and wants to visit me tomorrow. Even though I doubt I'll be conscious. And even if I am, I doubt I'll be at all coherent. Not based on last time I had this done.

Jenni is all confused because it's usually her that's in hospital and me that's worrying about her. This role reversal has confused the poor little Tot and she doesn't quite know what to do with herself =P. I am sure she will be fine with her new Glee DVD and lots of tea in her mug.

Hope it's something nice for tea in here today. Something with mash. I like hospital mash <3.

In other news, I have to decide if I want this tooth take out or a root canal and crown. Really unsure about having it out since you'd definitely be able to tell it was missing when I smile.

And! It's been warm again recently, but not really sunny. Just humid. The sun has been poking through now and again but not until the evening.
Meh, had a hint of a thunderstorm yesterday but it fizzled out quite quickly. Shame, I love storms.

That's it for now, petals.

Thursday, 2 June 2011

Sat in a towel.

Well! Managed to fix my own phone at last. It was a faulty digitiser they sent me last time. Took a little while for a new one to be sent out but in the end, I fixed the thing myself for under £15, rather than sending it off and it costing around £100. Win.

Also downloaded a Blog app. So I've been writing this particular entry all over the house. Currently just had a shower and sat on the bedroom floor.

Gave Claire her birthday present last night. Nice shiny laptop. Didn't think there was any point in it sitting there for six weeks when she could be getting the use out of it. Besides, gives her something to keep her busy 'cos I reeaally need to get some drawing done...

Summer of Sonic is looming and I need to get some STCO stuff sorted for it. Prints, freebies, competitions... Speeches?

Of course, Totday on the 26th, too! Need to just make sure I'm not hangover for that. Much easier to organise. In theory.
Totweek will be after that, Jenni has her train tickets now so that's all sorted =D.
Poor little Tot has to make a big, grown-up, three hour train journey all on her own though. Good job she's really a toughie and she only acts all weak and puppyish for the sympathy =P.

Needed to make another dentist appointment as the place I was referred to for surgery (Specialist place cos of all my meds) won't be able to see me until January. And the dentist who referred me has RETIRED so I have to go in to see someone new. Broken tooth = annoying. And it's starting to give me grief on a night. Needs sorting really.

Hot today! Sweaty sweaty <3.

Saturday, 28 May 2011

Duda-duda-duda-duda-dudadudaduda-5-4-3-2-1-THANK FUCK, A BUBBLE!

Just randomly thinking about stuff on the drive down to Wigan today.
The thing occurred to me a few weeks ago, actually. Never really thought about it before but one of my worst fears is being unable to breathe. Drowning, suffocating or choking.
I can't stay underwater very long because I can't hold my breath for long at all. Even though I have a fairly good lung capacity, I just can't not breathe for that long, it scares me.
I get really nervous if I yawn when I have food in my mouth. Just in case I choke on it. I have real fears about swallowing my own tongue because I heard a story about it once when I was like, 10.
Anyway, once I realised this fear, it made me wonder if it stems from my CF. Obviously breathing gets harder as the disease progresses. And while I do my best not to think about what could happen in the future, I'm thinking this whole fear thing may well be something ingrained deep inside my head.

May or may not be related but the Sonic drowning music (Yes, that is what the title is meant to represent) scares the SHIT out of me. I had it set as my alarm tone for a long time because I literally can not stand to hear it finish. It makes my heart race.
Not sure if this is related the the fear itself or just something hammered into my subconscious from years of playing Megadrive Sonic constantly.

Thought of the day. Make of it as you will.

Sitting comfortably? Then let's begin...

Yes! I am blogging again.
This is my more personal blog, if you're looking for the STC-O editor/artist blog, you should be over at I will update it soon, I SWEAR.
This blog will mainly be used for whinging, rambling, general life stories and thought provoking insights into the world.

Or I'll just forget about it like I usually do with blogs.

Driving down to Wigan to Claire's Mam's once I'm off here, just finishing off my meatballs on toast. Classy guy.

Annoyed that my new digitiser/screen for my HTC Desire hasn't turned up yet. Using my old, broken 6230i, not fun when you've been used to an android =/. A lot easier to text (nothing to do with the broken buttons on the 6230i), Facebook, Twitter, e-mail and a decent version of MSN on it for mutiple ways to constantly annoy mah Tot.

Currently looking forward to: my 25th, Claire's 21st, Summer of Sonic, Totday, Totweek.

More soon.